It's a very special day today.
It marks the day of what should have been but couldn't.
Hmmm, its been long since i last used my iphone.
I think i use 2 times only after i got enlisted into the army.
yep, was browsing through the pictures in my phone and realized
the different types of hairstlye i had in my final 2 years of poly.
Realize how i don't smile when i take pictures!?
Cause I believe that you can only capture a smile when it happens,
not when okay we are going to take a picture, everybody smile.
It was a normal morning for me. work up few minutes before my alarm rang.
Quickly went to wash up, get changed into my sports attire and went out to meet Edwin.
Setting alarms on weekend wasn't my thing, neither jogging when i'm not in camp.
Well, used to jog before i got enlisted but after that i kinda kicked the habit.
I get to train in camp and why should i train outside?
Weekends should be for me to rest and enjoy, right?
I just don't know why I asked Edwin to jog last night.
Maybe i needed to kill time, to keep myself distracted.
There's a big differences between me and Edwin.
I can run fast but i don't last long,
unlike me, he have lots of stamina i think, he can go on rounds and rounds.
I did my usual 2 rounds which was 2.6km and he did his usual 3-4 round.
When i finished my 2 rounds, i waited a few min before he end his 2nd round to start his 3rd.
On his 4th round he asked me to join him,
nevertheless i did.
so i did 3.9km and he did 5.2km.
Fair enough for me and we have this habit of walking another round for cool down and to catch up with each other.
As usual, he told me bout his game and army stuff.
And as usual, i told him bout my life and etc.
Then we would give each other advice,
maybe that's why he knows me better than I know myself
Normally he would send me home,
I don't know why but i'm always pampered and people always give in to me.
But today, i decided to send him home.
Was I out of my mine?
I guess so..
Normal routine of 30min became 1hour.
Edwin's a good friend, a brother indeed.
I don't even know if he reads my previous blog when i had the URL on my messenger.
Actually I don't even know if anyone I know reads my blog.
No wait, I take that back, I know of a person who does.
HI STALKER!! If you are reading this and i know you will, EAT YOUR MEDICINE!! :)
Knowing that people you know reads your blog might be a good/bad thing.
Cause it might affect the choice of language, and the choice of context.
To be true to yourself or nil.
To mentally shoot something into the readers mind without them knowing that you know they are reading your blog.
To me, i blog to tell my inner-self what I feel.
Cause sometimes when you have to say things out and there's nobody you can trust.
You tell it to yourself.
To feel better, and better understand yourself.
To adapt, to protect yourself.
I guess so? Well that's just my logic.
Take it or leave it.
I take it as a mini recorder, it records my life.
The ups and the down of it.
The happiness and the sorrows.
With each sorrow comes a lesson learnt.
I take the lessons that i learnt as improvement for the future.
But sometime's don't you wish that the person teaching you the lesson isn't the one teaching you?
It's just like that, rendering you helpless and you couldn't do anything.
Imagine you just suffered a major setback,
you lost the most important thing to you in life.
Lets call is object A.
You learn to avoid or eradicate the problem,
cause you never wanna lose object A again.
The fact is that you've already lost object A and the thing you learnt is to avoid/eradicate losing object B C D E F and so on.
Cause you only learn from when you lose something that means that much to you.
Hmm back to my day, I didn't foresee that I would be spending today alone, or with my poly mates.
It's another lesson learn, see.
Spend my whole afternoon wandering around Singapore.
Bugis,Marina Square,Esplanade,Marina Bay Sand Shoppes.
Normally i don't go out on weekends cause of the crowd and busy traffic.
Then again when I wander, I like to look at people faces.
When I see them happy, I wondered why they are happy.
When I see people cry, I wondered why they are sad.
Or when I'm sad, I wondered why they are happy.
Cause I expect them to be sad,
When I'm sad, I expect the whole world to be sad.
Maybe that's just me.
Unreasonable as always.
When I fail to understand something, I tend to find the answer from some other people or stranger.
Well not by asking them of course, just by observing them.
Why can they be so happy when my life is miserable,
or the other way round.
Simple! We simply don't know each other and we simply don't care for each other.
Tragic isn't it.
road along Esplanade and Singapore river.
The path ain't straight!
Just like life, it's never a straight road.
It doesn't let you see your future.
Sat at the outdoor stage for about 30-45mins looking at this band which consist of 6 beautiful tap dancers and 2 male tap dancers.
Rather inspiring, wished I could stay there forever,
being there takes out my stress somehow.
After the performance i went back into esplanade to cool down,
then got life performance by this pair of female vocalist.
They sang the song titled: the way i am which was originally sung by Ingrid Michaelson.
It was awesome! super awesome!
After that i met up with the rest for dinner.
Shouldn't have went to meet them.
Kinda enjoyed the time there alone.
It's the 2nd time I saw people doing this today.
Jason and Liyan writing.
I told myself not to write for the first time,
cause over some guilt issues.
But when I saw it the 2nd time and after everybody wrote their wishes.
I was like wth, just write only!!
A simple wish i wrote, the woman whom lent me her marker asked me why and gave me the curious look.
I didn't give her an answer, smiled at her and walked away.
Here's the differents between day and night.
After that everybody went to play kinect at cine and I took the best chance to bail.Time spent alone with myself again.
Still trying to figure yourself out.
Trying to be a better man.
Much love,
Daryl's double conscious.
